I Feel So Unnecessary

Mother comes to our door a minute ago with a bunch of kids, she asks her adolescent daughter if she wants candy.Leaning against our bannister, she replies "No" coolly. I ask her if she likes tootsie rolls, she replies "YEAH!" and takes the bag from me. I know how she feels-tootsie rolls revert me back to a little kid, too.

"Look at what I drew on the treat bags," I said to the husband. "It's folk art." "It looks like a dick with two eyes.", he said. I exclaimed, "It does not! They're ghosts." "Yeah, okaaay... Happy Halloweenie!", he said. Great, now the trick-or-treaters' parents are going to think I'm some kind of perv. They're not going to let their kids come to the house anymore. I can hear them now, "Don't go to that house on the left, that's the lady who draws the penis eyes." Happy Halloweenie everyone!!!