I Feel So Unnecessary

"Hey Lisa, you remember that ride at Silver Dollar City that looked like a big ol' rock and you went inside it and it was like a cave?" Me- "Kinda." "Well, when I win the lottery I'm gonna build a house and it's gonna be like that, a big ol ' rock cave and what was the name of that place where the Flintstones lived?" Scott- "Bedrock." Dad- "Well, mine's going to be named Dirt Clot." And... on my chicken philly steak I was in the middle of eating- "That looks like something the cat threw up." Me- "Thanks, Dad."

My Dad My husband and I, along with my parents had a yard sale Saturday. A woman came by and apparently my dad thought she wasn't going to get out of her car so..Dad being Dad he said to her: "Get on out, we're friendly." Lady: "Do you bite?" Dad: "No, I ain't got no teeth." I still haven't decided if that's a good selling tactic or an incentive to get in the car and run away as fast as you can.

Dad on churches and technology: " I heard on the news that churches are using the Bible anymore, it's all internet and pee pads." On cell phones: " People don't pay attention when they're driving. They whip out in front of you, flip open their cell phones, start twitting and twattering and playing with their crackberries."