I Feel So Unnecessary

The husband had a check-up recently. His potassium has been low and the doctor was going over options to get the level higher. Scott explained to him it had dropped before when he started exercising again and losing weight. He said he thought that's what was happening now and began explaining to the doctor about what was going on with him- Scott: "When a person starts to lose weight they lose fluid first...but of course you know that." Me : "Yes, he would considering he's a DOCTOR." Scott: "You know I had a sleep study, my neurologist had ordered one..oh yeah did you know I see a neurologist? What's his name?" Me:"Dr. A**hole." Scott:"I don't think she cared for him." Me: "Ya think?" Doctor: "No, I didn't." What does he do for you?" Scott: "It's not the same one but this one does a test on my neck, to check my carotid arteries." Me: "He doesn't treat him for h...

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 Because of my grandmother's condition she can't drive so she relies on me and my mother to take her out. Usually she likes riding on the back roads. When I went to visit her today she was ready to go out because she had been in the house for too long. So she asked me this almost as soon as I got there: Cille: "Is it real hot out there Lisa?" Me: "Yes it is." Cille: "Is it too hot for me to get out?" Me: "I don... Cille: "No, it's not." Of course I took her out because no matter how old I am- if either one of my grandmothers says "Jump!" I immediately obey them...because they scare me.  

Me: "You know Wise flooded today?" Scott: "Wise was filleted today?" Me: Good grief. Did you know that parts of Wise and Pound flooded today?" Scott: "Wise flooded? How did that happen?" Me: "It rained a lot." Scott: "Wise is built on a mountain, how can it flood there?" Me: "It flooded in the flat parts." Scott: "There are no flat parts in Wise, it's built on a mountain." Me: "Yes, there is. There are scoopy out parts in Wise that are flat...like a bowl and they flooded." You probably can't tell by the conversations I post...but yes we both are above average intelligence. Scary, ain't it?

As I said in an earlier posting my husband has a neurological condition similar to Parkinson's Disease and has trouble moving at times. He sometimes freezes up. He was explaining this to my brother one day- Scott: "You know sometimes when the med starts to wear off and I start to lock up, the only way I can move is to drop into a tai chi stance. So I figure the only job I'm  really qualified for now is ninja."

Mom: "How do you feel?" My grandmother: "Fine, I reckon I feel better than how you all act."

I got new glasses a few days ago. I was having trouble seeing out of the old ones and they were also starting to tear up. I got plastic frames, kind of retro looking. I had gotten used to wearing wire  frames for a long time but decided to go back to plastic frames. They're not as butt ugly as they used to be. I used to wear the huge, square plastic frames. Not a good look for a seven year old. Anyway, since I got so used to wire frames, I was having a hard time adjusting to the new ones. My husband kept looking at me and told me, "You look cute in your new glasses." I said, "I don't know. I think I look  like Buddy Holly." He then said, "A little, you should take up the guitar." (thanks dear) To which I responded, "That'll be the day." he, he...oh how I amuse myself.

Scott's redneck sock putter-onner My husband has dystonia- a movement disorder similar to Parkinson's Disease. Because of this he, uh well has trouble moving. Duh. Anyway, at times he needs help putting on his socks. Whenever I try to help for some reason he screams in pain. Hey, it's not like it's easy putting socks on an adult. So, he devised home-made assistive technology to help him put on his socks. That's a picture of it to the right. He puts his socks over the cardboard, slips his foot in the stretched-out sock, and then uses the pen attached to the string to lift his sock up. It actually works quite well. I call him the Hillbilly MacGyver.